Life Sucks, And Then You Die.

About four things I am absolutley positive: First, Ponyboy was in the hospital. And all because of me. That's right. What part of older sister didn't I got inside my stupid head? I'm like his role model, well, not role model to be precise, 'cause I'm pretty sure he looks forward to other much more worthy people than me, but yes his example. I mean, what I do somehow affects him. Perfect example: Yesterday night. I'm always drinking. Why? Because I like it. I like getting high, as if I didn't already do that with just plain living. It helps me clear my mind. It helps me relax. It....it helps me forget I'm a greaser. Go figure. So if I enjoy it too much, Ponyboy can assume he will enjoy it too. After all, nothing bad has happened to me. All he thinks is, nothing can happen to him. That was just the cup to my splendid end of the week, beginning of another. Second, Sherri Fucking Valance messing around with Ponyboy. As if I didn't already hated her guts for doing what she did to my brother, but finding her at the waiting room wanting to see Pony, just about ruined my day. I wanted to, and I guess I would have if Darry hadn't hold me down, beaten the hell out of her. Just wait sweetie, I wouldn't be wandering alone through the streets if I were you. Now, I know violence is never the answer. But it is an answer. And it is far easier than sitting to talk your problems, which if you ask me, would never happen. For one simple thing. I can't stand the sight of that red-head. Third, Soda's becoming a dad. Yay! Sarcasm anyone? I don't understand why every single one of you - sorry I'm generalizing- most of you all you want to do is have sex. What's so good about sex anyone? Cross that. I don't want to know, and I'm pretty sure others don't want to know either. The point is, sex is meant for making babies! Did you all skip Human Anatomy 101 class or what? And preferably when you're married and mature enough to have them!!! Hello people, what part of 'we're only teenagers ourselves' haven't you understand? No condom, no pill, no nothing is 100% safe! If you don't want to get pregnant or become a father, as simple as it is, don't do it! And fourth, life sucks and then you die. 'Cause somehow, the choice some people make screw us all. Like me for example, since Soda is becoming a dad, that means, the rest of us, Darry, Pony, and me are becoming uncles and aunt. Did I want that? Yeah, maybe. But at 20 something. Not 17! Not 17 people! Not 17! We will all have to stick to the consequences and only God knows how this is going to hit us.

Now I got all of that off my chest, and so, I can continue to tell you how my day went after I found out the truth. Sodapop had just told me I was going to be an aunt. Well, let's just begin by telling that I didn't kill him then and there because God is saint. But I swore, I was not angry, furious at him. Maybe not at him, or Katie, but surely at that thing inside her stomach. I guess you know by now all the things I yelled at him. We have always been closed and we have never fought. But I guess there is always a first time. I sure scared myself at that moment. Anyway, I couldn't see him, or Katie, or Ponyboy, or anyone. Not even Talan. I got out of the house, and just ran and ran and ran. I didn't ran away, and I'm not going to ran away. What is that useful for? It's not like my problems are going to faith. They're going to eventually catch up with me, whether I like it or not. What did I tell you? Life sucks. Until I reach the point that I couldn't run anymore. I screamed. Screamed with all I had. Screamed for once and for all. And that, unfortunately, made matters much worse. A red corvette pulled over where I was. Holy shit. You can picture the image. Out of the car, got five socs. Girls. Shit. I swear, I would have loved to have seen boys. But oh no. Life didn't like me. It was that pathetic little blondie girl and her gang of minions. I'll make a long story short. Some words here, some words there, a punch or two. more words, get a blade in, and then voulá! Add it all together and what do you get? Me lying on the floor with blood running down my cheeks and neck and all I want to do is cry. But I don't. 'Cause I can't. 'Cause it doesn't feel right. So I got up, clean what was left of myself to clean (it's just a figure of speech, don't worry) and walk over to the only place I want to be. An apartment. Luckily for me, psst, Brooke was there. She looked horrified when she saw me. And just as she was about to talk, I placed my hand over her mouth and placed a finger over my mouth. Translation: Don't talk. I let go and walk over to the first open door I see. A bedroom. And lock myself from the world for what's left of my doom.