You're A Spineless, Pale Pathetic Lot, And You Haven't Got A Clue. Somehow I'll Make A Man Out Of You

I'm going to murder Darrel Curtis. No. I'm gonna make him suffer, then kill him, then bring him back to life and make him suffer some more.

As you people know or may not know, for that matter, I'm not exactly the healthiest person on Earth right now and that's due to a lot of reasons. I'm not going to bore with what's behind it but I'm going to tell you what happened because of it.

Today, dear Darrel Curtis had a day off and because he doesn't have a social life of any sort, he came to bother me. I was sleeping soundly in the comfort of my own bed when all of the sudden I was shaked awake rather violently. I snapped my eyes open out of fright at the unexpected motion and looked up to see my older brother sitting next to me with his arms over my shoulders. "Raise and shine, sleeping beauty." He said. I blinked twice and turned to look at the alarm clock. I groaned as I placed the sheets over my head and hide myself from him. "It's fucking five in the morning. Are you crazy?" I asked half annoyed, half asleep. He rolled his eyes and pulled the sheets of me. "I'm serious, Kit. Get up and go get dressed and put on some shoes. We're going for a jog." He said. At the sound of 'get up' and 'going for a jog' on the same sentence, I shivered. It was five in the morning and Darry wanted to go for a run. He patted my knee and got up to leave my room. Once he was done I placed my pillow over my head and groaned deeply. Fuck this shit.

I put on the first shirt I could find, some shorts that I had spend countless hours trying to get them to shrink because they don't fit anymore, and my black converse. I was so fucking asleep I was surprised I had managed to get dressed properly. I didn't do anything else to myself. It was too early for me to give a shit and my hair is too short for a ponytail. So I just walked like that to the kitchen to rest my head on the table if given the chance. In the kitchen Darry was making some sort of weird creepy beverage. He placed milk, eggs, protein, and some more shit that looked disgusting at even the slight glance. He turned to look at me. "Hey, are ya hungry?" I gulped. "No. I'm good." I sighed. "Okay, I'm up can I go back to sleep now?" I was really so tired. It was a God forsaken hour, for crying out loud. Darry sighed heavily and turned to me. He got stragely closer and I leaned back, but he grabbed me by my wrist and pulled me closer. "Do you know why I'm doing this, Kit?" He asked holding my hand towards me. I frowned slightly. "To get me to a 'who can hold their arms in the air the longest' contest?" I admit it was a lame joke but I wasn't thinking. I was functuning on automatic pilot and Darry was using really big words for the time it was. He sighed. "Look at you, Kitty. See this?" He held my wrist up high again. "I'm afraid to break it if I squish it any tighter." He said. I frowned. What the fucking hell was he talking about? "And don't think I haven't noticed you haven't spend your afternoon pucking your guts off in the bathroom." Now I was getting angry. I let go of his grip in a quick violent manner and took a step back. "Your point being?" I said in a cold tone. He stared at me intently. "Kitty, you have to take better care of yourself. I mean, look at you." He pointed at me. I looked at myself from up to down. I didn't see anything wrong. Just my usual pretty self. "I doubt your clothes even fit anymore and you don't want to eat anything. And I... am just worried." I rolled my eyes. I wanted to prove just how completely wrong he was. I walked over to the kitchen counter and grabbed a glass from the cabinet. Against my better judgement I poured my glass with that disgusting mix and drank it without any hesitation. I would've been able to swallow it, if it hadn't been so damn bad. I hurried to the sink and spat the whole beverage. God, it tasted awful.

I could hear the sound of Darry tapping his foot onto the floor. "I would've drank it if it hadn't tasted so damn bad." I said. He raised an eyebrow. I groaned. "What do you want, Darry? To tell you I'm sick. I'm not sick. Get over it." I said. Darry rolled his eyes at my apparent lack of maturity and walked over to me. "All I want is to get you healthy and that means getting you back into shape." He said eyeing me up and down. "But Soda says it doesn't matter. All that is important is what's on the inside." I said on my defense. I knew I had to get into shape sooner or later but I had planned on doing it at my own pace at my own time. Without Superman behind my back. "Yeah well, Soda doesn't weight 95 pounds, now does he?" I nodded in agreement at the fact. Sorry Soda. If it's any consolation, Dally weights more. "Either way, let's go. We're already behind schedule." He said. Without waiting for me to say anything, he grabbed me by my hand gently and lead our way to the street. Behind schedule? This can't possibly be good.

And I was right. For the next hour and a half we jogged around our side of town. Well, Darry jogged, I kind of dragged my body to try to keep up. All that time I was thinking possible ways to kill him. Kill him and make it look like an accident. Then he made me do pull ups on a swings' bar until I literally dropped dead into the grass. -.- "Hurry up, Kitten. We are on time here." I groaned and stood up. He took us to the field and gave me a rope and ORDERED me to see how many I could do in a minute. Maybe that was because I had long ago not done any of this stuff and I wasn't in the best of condition. After the watch beep and he sighed disapointingly, I considered hitting him with the damn rope. It was nine in the morning and he didn't seem to give off any signs of a break. I was seriously thinking I would die in the attempt but Darry didn't let me die. Fuck him. By the time we where done, I was covered in sweat, laying on the field's grass, gasping for air and mercy. I couldn't feel my legs, arms, or any other body part. I couldn't even think. "Okay, we're done for the day, Kitty. Let's go home." He said as if though I wasn't half dying on the floor. "Can you carry me?" I asked with slight hope in my tone. "Nope. A jog home will do you good." WHO WANTS TO HELP ME MURDER MR. DARREL SHAYNNE CURTIS JR.????!!!!

I groaned and walked home with him. He opened the door and we found Pony, Soda, and Katie playing poker on the table. All comfortable and lazy with cokes and perfectly nice pillows. I envied them. "Hey guys! Weere were you?" He asked innocently. "We just went for a jog." Darry said casually. Just a freaking jog?! -.- Soda turned to look at me and chuckled. "Woah, Kit. You look great." He grinned mockingly. Katie and Pony where trying not to laugh but I ignored them. I shot Sodapop a dead glare. "Shut. The. Fuck. Up. Or. I'll. Beat. You." I said between gasps. That caused Katie and Pony to burst into laughter. I rolled my eyes. "I'd like to see you try." The fatty I have as a brother said. I groaned. I walked towards them and crashed on the couch. "Maybe. Later." Darry walked back to the living room and as if the situation wasn't worst, he added. "We're doing the same tomorrow Kit, it's a daily plan. So get ready." The others laughed and I just shut my eyes and wished someone would kill me.

Someone, please kidnap me and save me from Superman. Robbin (or whoever the name of the sidekick is) doesn't want to save the freaking day.