"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Cancun." The flight attendance said once we landed. I turned to look at Two-Bit. "Cancun, really?!" He smiled proudly. "Happy honeymoon, sweetie." He said kissing me. Out of all the places in the world, the beach is my second favorite. The first is his arms. We checked in at the Mayan Palace, put on our swimsuits (thank you Jelly, for not letting Two-Bit pack my things) and hit the beach. For the next few weeks, our days consited on waking up late, breakfast in bed (courtesy of the friends we made the last time we were here), hanging out in the beach, dress up, go around town and them hit any party going on at the local bars until the sun came up (literally).
We where laying down on the beach, Two-Bit was asleep. He had a little to many Pi;a Coladas. So, I being the nice wife that I am, buried him in the sand. Thank god he's not a light sleeper. It took me an hour, plus the help of a little girl, to shape the sand around him like a six-pack, with muscles filled with manhood. I told you I wanted that six-pack. Finally, when we finished, I took the little girl for a well-deserved ice-cream, and left Two-Bit all alone! Anyway, the little girl had friends and a hot brother ;) So they invited me on this thing called a Banana. It's an inflatable sort of boat, but shaped as a banana! You sit on it and a boat drags you around the sea. Pretty funny. After a couple of hours, I realized, I may have forgotten about something. Two-Bit was still buried in the sand battling to get free. Funniest thing I've ever seen! He asked me to help him. I refused by signing up for surf lessons. Epic stuff. You should all try it sometime. After getting hit by an unhealthy amount of waves, not fun, I decided it was time to help poor Two-Bit. Turns out, he managed to get out all by himself. I'm proud. That's when the epic battle between good and awesome broke!
He signed up for surf lessons with me, we were fooling around when he snuck behind me and untied my swimsuit. -.- Bad move. Guys, piece of advice. NEVER untie a girl's swimsuit, blouse, or bra unless she asks you too. It's not cool. I sank into the water as I tried to tie it again. I didn't get angry. It was a well-deserved payback. But it cost dear Mr. Keith a week-worth of no sexual activity. Anyway, the next few days we traveled around the town buying all sorts of gifts for us. Sorry guys, it was either you or us, and well let's face it, us is better. But we did send postcards! One day we went to the tip of the Mexican penninsula. The prettiest place I've ever seen. We were laying on the beach, holding hands. I could stay like that forever. "I don't want to go, but we have to." I said. "No, we don't." Two-Bit said. I turned to look at him. "What do you mean, we don't?" I asked. "Well, I wasn't sure how long you wanted this to last, so I bought no return ticket." He said. My face lit up in joy. "You mean we never have to come back?!" I asked. "Not if you don't want to." And I didn't. We went MIA all July, until finally, Darry got a hold of us. -.- He figured we weren't coming back if it was up to us so he bought us a return ticket. -.- Oh well, it was too good to be true.
When we got back, Darry and Soda were waiting for us, along with every one of you people. "Don't worry, it's not like we where going to live without you." I lied but oh well. Sometimes I feel like I'm married to you guys instead of just Two-Bit. But I get it, you can't live without me and as flattered as I am, it pisses me off. But that month was the best vacation I've ever had. Thank you, Tibbs for a great honeymoon. Oh and maybe, we can tell the gang our little secret. ;)
